Nilla Puddin’: The Return of Rap’s Most Inept Practitioner




Y’all hear that thumping bass line, boys and girls,

That means that Nilla Pudding’s about to take a stab


Let’s start the New Year right, dat right, right,

Not wrong with some sappy tune.


Dat there bass don’t seem enough

Let’s add some drums to the mix-ture


Oh yeah, that sounds better

Some guitar for the icing

Might make the mix more en-tertaining.


Uh-uh, now we’re crusining.


As you know, Nilla Puddin’ is my name

And rapping is my avocation


Busting rhymes left and right

Got a back-up sound that’s so so taut


As taut as a tick, it’s so so ill

Gonna give my posse a spine shudder


Diggin’ it sistah?

Gonna give my vocal chord a blistah


You catch the rhyme


I’m on a roll

Jelly Roll Morton


Dr. Thomas Horton


Beth Orton


The smile on her mouth

Was plagerized




Oh, shoot, I gotta go,

The grits be boiling overflow


Like I said Nilla Pudding is my name

And rapping is my avocation



2 thoughts on “Nilla Puddin’: The Return of Rap’s Most Inept Practitioner

  1. I like that drum beat. Sounds like a drum machine, but I could be mistaken. It’s probably only a matter of time bf someone combines rules of poetry (e.g. syllable count) with the flow of rap to make up something similar to your Nilla Pudding. Wow, though — you really remained in character for that :). Happy New Year.

    • Hey, Rodney, I made the tune, if that’s what you wanna call it, via Garage Band. It’s made up of bass tracks, a drum loop, and something called “funky disco guitar.” Thanks for reading, and Happy New Year to you and Lynda!

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