There Goes Peter Cottontail

Who was the first to go?

"Tooth Fairy" by Greg Becker

“Tooth Fairy” by Greg Becker

The Tooth Fairy, that’s who, that little fetishist, sneaking into children’s bedrooms, trading money for teeth. I suppose the Tooth Fairy is the least definite of the fantasy commies who distribute goodies among the masses. I can’t even tell you if the Tooth Fairy is supposed to be male or female, old or young, corporeal or diaphanous. As it turns out, virtually every google image that comes up is female. Anyway, I’m not sure I ever believed in her.

Even more preposterous is the Easter Bunny, I remember being about five or so, and my old man telling me that the Easter Bunny wouldn’t be showing up because he’d been hit by a car. Daddy claimed to have seen the rabbit’s roadkill carcass on the side of the highway. Of course, I knew he was kidding by the bemused look on his face; however, his story made me try to visualize the dead Easter Bunny. How big was he?   Was he wearing a bow tie?

8571e424cbad2765eb1500bb3fb6e4f7How idiotic — a rabbit toting a continent’s worth of tooth-rotting chocolate and jelly beans from house to house from Maine to California.

Of course, that left Santa, whom I did believe in until I was nine or so, refusing to heed the cross-my-heart-hope-to-die sworn statements of my more sophisticated buddies. By the time Mama broke the official news, we kids had been scoping out the yuletide stash for a couple of years, sneaking up into the attic when the parents were away, or, when no one was around, peeking under the door of the vacated apartment across the hall from my grandmother’s.

And they are right: Christmas was never the same after that.

Which brings us, as James Joyce might say, past Eve and Adams, to Jesus himself, whose legitimacy as the Son of God I also started doubting at a tender age, and as far as believing goes, I’ve given it my very best — took my confirmation classes very seriously, read CS Lewis, studied the gospels — but, alas, I just can’t will myself to believe, and that is that.

So I took up Buddhism instead in the hope of achieving an equanimity with the mysterious universe that can seem so beautiful but also so cruel; however, let’s face it: you can’t pray to Siddhartha, and he certainly ain’t gonna perform any miracles for you.

How wonderful it must be to have a bedrock of faith, to be certain that you are loved and can conquer death, and certainly, in my family’s current situation, it would be particularly nice to be able to “talk” to a greater power and seek solace and strength. Some of my Christian friends have seemed a bit hesitant to share with me after hearing Judy’s diagnosis of lymphoma that they’re praying for us, but as Judy said just yesterday, “I’ll take prayers, vibrations, chi. Bring it on”

“What about sacrificial heifers?

“Those, too”

In other words, we’re not the arrogant Christopher Hitchens or Richard Dawkins brand of non-believers, so please pray if you’re a praying person, and think good thoughts if you’re not.

We’ve been really humbled by the outpouring of love we’ve received so far. Thank you all!

9 thoughts on “There Goes Peter Cottontail

  1. I will pray for complete restoration of health, peace for you and a sense of being
    carried through this shitty ordeal by a presence you never knew existed

  2. praying….

    Lord Jesus Christ, you are the great physician, and by the might of your command, you drive away from our bodies all sickness and all infirmity in ways that I neither understand nor control. Yet you taught us to bring every care and concern to our heavenly father, who loves us more than we do ourselves, and so I pray, in hope, obedience, and the power of your name, that you will be present by your Holy Spirit with my friend Judy, and that by your presence her cancer may be banished and her strength restored. Give us eyes of faith so that even in the midst of sickness and suffering, we might know that comfort and joy that confound human understanding, and being filled with these things, minister mercy to others, even as we are in need, for I ask these things in your name, Lord Jesus. Amen.

  3. Andrew, Brother, thanks. Fleming had a blast jamming with you at Kunuga and claims I appear in one of your songs that mentions teachers. Right on! Maybe that will be my fifteen minutes. As the post sez, we appreciate all prayers and all the love we’ve received!

  4. My prayers have been with you both since I first heard and will continue throughout. What’s in your hearts is what matters and I know you too well to doubt God is there.

  5. Wesley and Judy. I’m so so sorry to hear this. I am a praying women and I do believe in gods healing powers. I will continue praying for peace, wellness and gods good grace. Love. Robyn Whatley

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